The Pill

I was twenty-something and at lunch with a group of clients. We were at some nice restaurant in Denver with clean windows, fancy water glasses and linen napkins. I was trying not to fidget at a circular table with middle managers.

The beginnings of my professional life were marked by a painfully awkward, knobby-kneed feeling that followed me everywhere I went. I remember this lunch, though, with particular clarity. Trying to be both impressive and casual.

It must have been 1999 because how every polite conversation was a “Best of…” commemorative. Best Short Stories of the Twentieth Century, for example, or Most Memorable Kisses on Screen, Most Influential Historic Moments …you get the idea. And our group spontaneously fell into a polite banter which asked what the "Most Groundbreaking Invention of the Twentieth Century" might have been.

I sat, smiled, and listened to compelling arguments for inventions such as: the polio vaccine, the microchip, the atomic bomb, the air conditioner, radio and television broadcasting. Somebody posed the question directly to me. My answer came out loud and clear without an iota of doubt or hesitation: The Pill.

And the beach-ball bounce feeling that accompanies any lively conversation sort of fell (ka-thunk) on the floor. Somebody coughed. It never even dawned on me that saying so might have been wildly inappropriate in a business setting.

My mention of The Pill could be taken more as a statement of my sexual prowess rather than how I intended it. What I meant was this: having the power to determine if, when, and how many children you have was a seismic shift. Women suddenly lived out their career goals and educational aspirations. Our lives looked fundamentally different. Our marriages functioned differently thereafter. Our consumption of resources, the cultural awareness of child psychology were irrevocably altered.

Somebody must have changed the subject after my Pill proclamation, or the food arrived to break the silence. I remember unwrapping my flatware from the napkin and thinking, clearly, I had won the Most Groundbreaking Invention of the Twentieth Century debate.

It's a moment that came to me as I read on CNN that this weekend, Sunday actually, marks the 50th Anniversary of the FDA approving use of birth control pills. I wished I could grab the sweaty hand of that twenty-something girl at the lunch table. Squeeze her fingers in mine and say, "I know exactly what you mean!"